Simply message but for some people hard to understand

October 6, 2006 at 3:14 pm (Society)

Austin gave me the tip and i copied it from Miquie
I think that this is ok since she writes: Please re-post, even if you think everyone in your network of friends knows better.

A lot has been said about how to prevent rape.

Women should learn self-defense.
Women should lock themselves in their houses after dark.
Women shouldn’t have long hair and women shouldn’t wear short skirts.
Women shouldn’t leave drinks unattended. In fact, they shouldn’t dare to get drunk at all.

But, if fact, rape is not just a female bodied concern. And rape is not the responsibility of the survivor, it is the responsibility of the predator. Men, male-bodied people, and other bodied/gender identified people should be concerned with rape.

Instead of that sexist, victimizing ideal, how about:

If a person is drunk, don’t rape them.
If a person is walking alone at night, don’t rape them.
If a person is drugged and unconscious, don’t rape them.
If a person is wearing a short skirt or shorts, don’t rape them.
If a person is jogging in a park at 5 am, don’t rape them.
If a person looks like the ex you’re still hung up on, don’t rape them.
If a person is asleep in their bed, don’t rape them.
If a person is asleep in your bed, don’t rape them.
If a person is doing their laundry, don’t rape them.
If a person is in a coma, don’t rape them.
If a person changes their mind in the middle of or about a particular activity, don’t rape them.
If a person has repeatedly refused a certain activity, don’t rape them.
If a person is not yet a adult, but a child, don’t rape them.
If a person is “ugly” and you think they’ll appreciate it in the long run, don’t rape them.
If the person agrees to sex with a condom, but you want to take it off, don’t rape them.
If your partner or significant other is not in the mood, don’t rape them.
If your child or family member is watching tv, don’t rape them.
If you break into a house and find a person there, don’t rape them.

If your “friend” thinks it’s okay to rape someone, tell them it’s not, and that they’re not your friend.
If your “friend” tells you they raped someone, report them to the police.
If your peer or another person at the party tells you there’s an unconscious person upstairs and it’s your turn, don’t rape them, call the police and tell the peer they’re a rapist.

If they moaned and got hot, you’re still a rapist.
If they came, you’re still a rapist.
If they were on top, but forced, you’re still a rapist.
If you used a condom, you’re still a rapist.
If there were no weapons involved, you’re still a rapist.
If they were someone you had sex with before, you’re still a rapist.
If it was oral or anal sex, but forced, you’re still a rapist.
If you used a foreign object in the act, but not any part of your own body, you’re still a rapist.

Tell family, friends, co-workers, neighbors it’s not okay to rape someone.
don’t tell your friends how to be safe and avoid rape, or what they “should” have done.
don’t imply that they could have avoided it if they’d only done/not done x.
don’t imply that it’s in any way their fault.
don’t let silence imply agreement when someone tells you they “got some” with the drunk person.
don’t perpetuate a culture that tells you that you have no control over or responsibility for your actions. You can, too, help yourself.

There’s no excuse for raping someone and no excuse for blaming the victim also.

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2 Comments

  1. miquie's crew said,

    so true and i am glad that you posted this and you wanted to. thank you.

    keep it going more if you want …
    take care and know you are in our thoughts ….

  2. miquiecrew said,

    that blog ended up closing and i have this new one that i have been posting on. you are still welcome to come to this new blog …

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